You’ve probably noticed that I don’t talk about
the idea of “romance” very often.
There’s a good reason for this and why fuckbook dating works.
I think that most guys use romance in
completely the wrong way, and in the process screw
up their chances with the woman that they are
I’m going to take some time here to talk about
my personal perspective on romance, how it is
misused, and how to use it to really make a woman
feel attracted to you.
Most fuckbook guys make one of two main mistakes when
trying to be “romantic”:
1) They try to use romance to CREATE attraction.
2) They use TOO MUCH romance, thinking that more
must be better.
Let me ask you this… What does romance mean
I’m serious. Think about it for a minute.
Does romance mean gifts and flower?
Does it mean fancy dinners?
Does it mean candles and soft music?
To me, romance is about showing a softer side
of yourself… a more thoughtful side… in a way
that is meant to INCREASE the woman’s attraction
Like I just mentioned, most guys either try to
use romance to CREATE attraction, or they do too
many things in an attempt to “be romantic”, and
the effect is lost.
Here’s a quiz:
In general, would a woman think you were more
romantic if you:
1) Brought her red roses every time you saw her.
2) Brought her one flower the fourth time you saw
her, but it was her favorite flower, in her
Here’s another one…
In general, would a woman think you were more
romantic if you:
1) Took her to a fancy dinner every time you saw
2) Didn’t take her to dinner, but one night cooked
her a favorite dish that your mom taught you and
told her the story of how it came to be a family
Do you see where I’m going with these examples?
“Romance” is all about the context of the
situation. In other words, little things that are
thoughtful, used once in awhile will make FAR more
of an impact than trying to do everything you
possibly can all the time.
Have you ever seen a T. V. show or movie with a
girl holding a flower, pulling off each petal one
at a time and saying, “He loves me, he loves me
This is a famous cliche… even Madonna does it
in her old “Truth or Dare” movie.
What’s going on here? And why is it now such a
famous idea that it is almost universally known?
Because it strikes a chord inside of women
everywhere! Every woman can relate to the idea of
thinking about a man and wondering if he’s
thinking about her.
Pulling petals off of a flower and saying, “He
loves me, he loves me not”, is just another way of
saying, “I can’t stop thinking about this guy and
I’m going to keep thinking about him until I know
how he feels.”
As you know, if you’ve read past newsletters
and/or my ebook, I think that it’s important to
CREATE this kind of situation as much as humanly
Now, here’s where romance fits into the
puzzle… If you’re doing things that you consider
to be “romantic” all the time, then she has
nothing to wonder about… nothing to think
about… there is no challenge or mystery at all.
On the other hand, if you use romance more
carefully and keep her on the edge of her seat, so
to speak, then a small romantic gesture will cause
her to feel GREAT feelings of attraction inside…
and cause her to work even harder to get and keep
your attention – BECAUSE SHE’LL TRY HARDER TO GET
MORE OUT OF THIS ROMANTIC SIDE OF YOU!
So what are some things you can do, that women
see as romantic, without going overboard?
Well, if you want to do the typical things like
flowers, gifts, music, poetry, etc. then do as I
said earlier: Use them VERY infrequently. Tease
her, bust on her, treat her like a bratty little
sister most of the time, then out of nowhere do
something thoughtful. But make sure to stay cool
when the emotional reaction comes!
She’s probably going to be very happy and want
to know “where that came from.” Just tell her that
you were thinking about her and move on to the
next topic. Don’t get all mushy, dude.
By the way, if you’ve gone out with a woman 47
times, and you don’t know if she likes you, and
you’re now thinking, “Oh, hey… great idea! I’ll
buy her a flower and she’ll feel attracted to
me…” then get a new idea.
Romance isn’t a way to make a woman feel
attracted to you.
Romance is a way to AMPLIFY attraction that is
Read that last part again… DON’T TRY TO MAKE
A WOMAN FEEL ATTRACTED TO YOU WITH ROMANCE!
Attraction is created by factors other than
gifts, dinners, flowers, etc.
If she’s not feeling attracted to you, then
showing her that you’re attracted to her probably
isn’t going to change it… in fact, it may just
push her away.
I know, I know… you once heard about a guy
who pursued a woman for 9 years until she finally
gave in and married him. Well, that might work,
but I don’t have 9 years (unless it’s Cindy
Crawford… yeah, I know she’s like 50, but she’s
Earlier I mentioned a couple of great ideas.
You can cook her a special meal that has
meaning… and tell the story behind it. Stories
are romantic, especially if the story contains a
And small gifts can be romantic as well (I
don’t like big gifts because they change the
dynamic of the relationship and can create all
kinds of feelings that it’s a trade of affection
for money, etc.).
If you pay attention, a woman will mention
something that she really likes. It could be a
kind of flower, a kind of music, an author, etc.
If you want to be romantic (after you know that
she’s attracted to you) you can get something
thoughtful then write a card that says, “I was
thinking about you, and I found this… thought
you would like it. Kiss Kiss.”
Use romance as the spice, and not the main
dish. Use it to amplify, not as your main
Romance combined with the techniques that I
teach is a VERY powerful combination.
QUICK NOTE: One of the most “romantic” things
you can possibly do is learn how to communicate
with women on a “sexual” level. There’s nothing as
powerful as using subtle communication to put a
woman into a VERY romantic mood.
HOW TO CREATE A SETTING THAT AUTOMATICALLY CREATES
AND AMPLIFIES ATTRACTION…
We just talked about how most guys either have
no clue about romance, or they use it too much…
which screws up everything for them.
There is one aspect of romance that I have
found very useful to know more about and use. It’s
the concept of how to create a SETTING that will
create more of a feeling of attraction inside of
the woman that you are with.
WARNING: What I’m about to share with you is
not a magic bullet. It’s no substitute for a
cocky, funny personality and great skills. Using
this alone will not make you successful with
With that said… I’ve found that there are a
few things you can do in your immediate
environment to “accelerate the mood”, so to speak,
when you are with a woman.
Women have very active senses… usually much
more so than men.
If you have already sparked the attraction
between you and her, introducing certain sensory
stimulus will usually increase the attraction, and
can lead to a more, shall we say “physical”
demonstration of that attraction.
OK, let’s say that you’ve had a fun night out
with your girl (and of course, because you read
Double Your Dating you knew where to take her that
was fun and inexpensive) and you’re back at your
place. (Of course, she came inside because you
learned how to get her to come in from the book
And then you use the Kiss Test, which you
learned when you visited my web site… and you’ve
just kissed for the first time. Now what?
Well, most guys make the HUGE mistake of trying
to grope the poor girl… which, of course leads
to the inevitable “I think that we’re moving a
little fast. Let’s take things slower.”
(Translation: “None for you tonight, and if you
try that again, none for you anytime in the next
Instead, try this:
After that first kiss, pull back and look into
her eyes and say, “Yum.” Then stand up and say,
“Let me see if I can do something about this
setting” in a fun, smooth, kind-of suspenseful
tone of voice.
Here’s the recipe:
1) A few candles
2) Some incense
3) A glass of wine (if you both drink and are of
4) Sade’s – Greatest Hits on low
I know it sounds simple, but let me explain the
recipe now that you know the ingredients.
Remember the formula “Two steps forward, one
step back” that I often talk about? Mix up these
ingredients with that concept… and VIOLA! More
and MORE AND MORE attraction.
You probably don’t need to learn how to light
candles, open wine, and play music. If you do,
refer to the instructions that come with the
I personally like to introduce these as great
ways to interrupt the kissing (and whatever else
is going on).
1) Kiss Kiss
2) “Let me see if I can do something about this
3) Light candles and incense, lower lighting
4) Kiss Kiss
5) Open wine and put on ‘Sade’
6) Kiss Kiss
7) Watch out… because something good is about to
Here’s what’s going on in her mind:
“Oh, we’re kissing. I’d better not let this go
“What? Why did he stop kissing me? Oh, candles.
I love candles…”
“Wow, this is turning into a make-out session,
maybe I’d better put on the brakes.”
“What? Why did he stop again?”
“Ohhh, I LOVE ‘Sade’. Her voice is so sexy. And
this wine is nice. Hmm, I wonder why he isn’t
trying to jump my bones. Maybe he doesn’t think
I’m a good kisser. Maybe he changed his mind. Well
I’m not going to let that happen. I’ll show
Do you get it?
By simultaneously creating tension while making
the setting more and more ‘romantic’, you will
stir up her ATTRACTION towards you and make her be
the one who ultimately gets so worked up that she
can’t help but have you.
Of course there are many other things you can
do that are romantic. Like sprinkling rose petals
on the bed, pulling out some Godiva chocolate, or
lighting up the fire and grabbing a blankie (make
sure you don’t bring out your teddy-bear from when
you were a kid… that might not go over too
It’s really up to you.
The key is to use these things sparingly, and
use them with the concepts that you’ve already
learned to AMPLIFY THE ATTRACTION that you’ve
already created with your COMMUNICATION.
So fuckbook members, remember, use these things with women who
are ALREADY feeling the attraction, not to create
So… you like what you’re hearing?
So… you want to learn more?
So… you want to learn how to take control of
this entire area of romance and sexuality with
My newest program is called “Power Sexuality”.
I waited a long time to create this program. It
was an intense project.
After several years of teaching guys how to be
more successful with women and dating, I realized
that there was a kind of “root problem” that was
at the heart of many challenges men face.
Some men will describe this problem as a lack
of “Sexual Confidence”.
And it’s more than just not knowing what to do
in the bedroom.
It’s about learning to get in touch with that
part of yourself that’s been “pushed down” for so
many years… and to enjoy it.